~Happier~

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This weekend was a blast, probably the most freeing and happy I’ve felt in a while. (Aside from this painful sunburn I’m slowly recovering from). I took a trip to the coast and it was wonderful. I’m usually not a fan of Seaside, because the town is super boring but I literally stayed on the beach for 10 hours! I played flag football and dipped my feet in the ice cold pacific ocean and read some of “Wild” by Cheryl Strayed. It was a good time.

Then last night I went to see Ed Sheeran and now I can scratch that off my bucket list. He was SO good! And I was charmed by James Blunt, now I know more than 1 song of his. I’ve been listening to him on repeat since last night. Super good!

Then today I was able to go in to work about 4 hours late so I got to rest for once and cook myself breakfast. It was much needed “me” time. I even went straight home after work and cleaned my room. So refreshing.

Can’t believe it’s supposed to be 100+ degrees Fahrenheit starting tomorrow until Friday though. I’m lucky my parents have AC so I’m going to go over there starting tomorrow night and crash on the couch.

I’m excited for Thursday, I get to have dinner with a couple of my good friends from high school (One of which is my roommate, but we rarely see each other even though we live in the same apartment haha).

It’s currently 9:24pm and I’m having an innocent fantasy about meeting Ed Sheeran someday (It’ll never happen). The LOML (Love of my life) just texted me and I’m about to meet up with him to do some late night grocery shopping (perks of being a twenty something year old). I hope I’m not out too late because I’m actually quite exhausted.

Goodnight world,

MM.

 

 

And this is where I begin…

 “If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month” – Theodore Roosevelt

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At twenty-something, I have finally moved out of my parents house. Is it scary, yes? Is it as freeing as it would have been if I were 18? surprisingly, nope.

I’m currently blasting Ed Sheeran and drinking a Mike’s hard lemonade out of a wine glass, so there’s that.

I keep having to remind myself lately that it’s okay, to not be okay. Some days (most days) I have to convince myself that I’m ok.  When I’m in a sad and lonely mood, hiding under my blankets and being locked in my room all day sounds perfect, but in reality I have to wake up early and work that 9-5 to pay my bills and survive.

Do you ever feel that way? Where you can be surrounded by the ones you love or by company but you feel like drowning and there’s no escape from the loneliness? That’s how I feel today. And I know it’s all in my head, but I can’t help it. So I’m sitting here typing, listening to “How Would You Feel”, sipping fake wine from this glass, and pretending everything’s ok! On the bright side, at least tomorrow’s Friday.